life... and loving it!

hehe.

2004-11-02T01:44:00.000-08:00

im... hahaha.. back to old self again.
just finished with exams and gaga over ex and crushes.
so over with that phase....

lifes too short.
im not the gurl whos going to change him..
too bad i was up for the challenge. hahaha...

aryty...
i love my friends..

im just gonna live my life like i was in heaven.
woohoo!!
wuv life! =)

im cool now

2004-10-10T02:15:00.000-07:00

just the other week my guy broke up with me.. at the same day i was kicked out of my house. what a day right?
my bestfriend has another bestfriend whom she loves spending time with... im jealous... hahaha sounds wrong... i know.
my grandmother, didnt talk to me for a week!
rosselle, one of my realy close friends told me the other day that i changed. not anymore the wacky and happy go lucky girl that i used to be.
pressured with school.
quit the volleyball team.

i dont know whats happening to me... it seems like this is my breaking point. i lost my boyfriend whom i honestly didnt think of falling inlove with but i did. lucky me... his problem? hes not affectionate, he loves me but he doesnt know how to act like it. my problem? him... because meer fact that i love him. i want him, but hes not what i deserve. but i insist on pursuing him.

losing a friend its more than enough to break down for me... i love them more than my life.

now that i lost a lot of things. including my appetite for socializing.
im lost, i dont feel comfortable with people around..im not emotionally stable though i try to be.
in the classroom i sense somehow everyones superficial, fake. this is not true.
the only person i feel comfortable with is Kat. this is really bad.
i feel paranoid, overly concious. im stupified by whats happening.
i had a lot of friends, in just a snap i dont know whos real?.... sad isnt it..

my grandma and i are cool now.
josh and i are friends. trying to be at least. hes my bumpkin.
jill, i hope shes happy with micah. and stays that way.

i just saw two rainbows at the same time
fascinating, so beautiful.
hope is still out there for me to find.

all the things are crashing into me at the same time.
its so hard to be sad. its just not me.
hopefully i get over this phase soon.
so life is not put to waste.

in memories of: haha parang patay na...

fuck!

2004-09-03T02:13:00.000-07:00

got mugged the other day by these 2 guys riding a scooter? or bike... my 2 week yr old cell was there, my pictures, which is like so impt to me. how did this happen>?

o well somehow because of my stupidity, i walked my way home from gh... which is a bit far.. aryt arryt its far. why the hell did i walk? because got no money left, i hate borrowin and i told my granma that im goin home early. my friends are all goin home late, so i decided to go home, when i texted got no fuckin load. ahahaha lucky huh? 2 blocks from my house there i got mugged. what a lucky day...

when i got home, my granmother and i fought, i cant contact my friends, josh and i talked, tanx to him i felt better. aw... i finaly found my right soul.

i just hope i lost my things for a good cause, because somebody needs it more than i do.
im happy im still alive.

~everything happens for a reason~
when my boyfriend for 3 yrs broke up with me...
i learned the value of friendship.
when i got mugged....
i learned the value of life.

material things are replaceable... but life... we only get to have one.

retreat

2004-08-26T18:16:00.000-07:00

i just had my retreat... well first of all its very relieving. like what carl said because you know there arent anymore pretensions, im happy that one time in my life i get to have this experience, got to bond with the class and especially with God... the 4-c class had a deeper bond and its quite obvious,i just hope that itll last.. it was really special because we had a chance to let it all out, all our grudges, feelings, being thankful and all that...i even cried. hahaha comedy.

in this certain session where you get to read your palancas, everyone, i mean almost everyone got teary eyed,i find it weird, then on the latter part i was envious with those who did, because they felt so happy, for a fact those were tears of joy and you can tell., something was missing, i dint have parents. but then again even if i have my complains, im lucky for having my friends,complete fingers and toes... im lucky to be there. very lucky. im so thankful, and i also thanked God for making all my loved ones so happy... ive never seen such joy in a long time.

besides from not having tv's, radios, and all the gadgets we get to have in our everyday life... i wish, we can do it over and over again. and i hope that this wonderful experience will be a lasting one. as well as it ismeaningful.

a new beginning

2004-08-18T03:41:00.000-07:00

changed a lot here in my blog... you can go view the pictures after the tagboard.. feel free look wherever you want to.. hehehe... anyway.. i aint posting anything here for the meanwhile, its my exams and i hafto study its math and statistics tomorrow... so everyone pray for me to pass and also wish me luck, i surely need it...